The Top 10 ‘RuPaul’s Drag Race’ Confessional Queens
Welcome to a special one-off Top 10 ranking, brought to you by Patreon subscriber Elijah! As part of the Drag Race Rewind project, $10-tier subscribers get to request one Top 10 ranking per month of anything RuPaul’s Drag Race-related. Elijah’s request was for a Top 10 of the best confessional queens across the series. If you’d like to request your own ranking, as well as getting recaps and power rankings of classic Drag Race seasons delivered to your inbox every week, consider subscribing to the project! (Or, if you’re already subscribed, consider upping your monthly contribution!)
Whither the confessional queens of RuPaul’s Drag Race? They’re not always the strongest performers, though they can be, and they’re not always the nicest queens (though some have won Miss Congeniality anyway). There’s no real natural mechanism on Drag Race to reward these queens for their contribution to the show. But the show would be nothing without them — they produce the big viral moments, the instantly quotable lines, and the GIFs that will be used from here to eternity.
So let’s salute those queens who pull out pithy one-liners and shine in their private moments. This list is for you, and for all you’ve done to make RuPaul’s Drag Race as great as it is. (Honorable mentions go to queens like Willam, Trixie Mattel, and A’keria C. Davenport, who just missed making this list.)
10. Shannel, Season 1 and All Stars 1
I wouldn’t have put Shannel on this list were it not for my ongoing rewatch of Season 1. No one was funnier in that first season than this Las Vegas queen. She was convinced that she should win every challenge, and didn’t hesitate to tell us so. She amazed herself! When she avoided the bottom two, she was shocked, because the judges are usually so negative toward her! Shannel wasn’t nearly as fun and ego-driven in All Stars 1, but man, her season 1 incarnation was too iconic.
9. Raven, Season 2 and All Stars 1
I admire the early season queens who turned the party in confessionals, long before it became clear what exactly would pop in confessionals. Raven brought in big C.U.N.T energy, trashing her fellow competitors in a way that would get her cancelled at the drop of a hat these days. She was a cool girl bully, and if she weren’t so damn funny as she ripped into her competition, it would’ve been hard to watch. As it stands, it was too delicious to not earn our giggles. She calmed down for All Stars 1, but still gave plenty of attitude for your nerves.
8. Alyssa Edwards, Season 5 and All Stars 2
Originally, I had Alyssa much higher on this list, but I realized that so many of her most quotable moments actually came from her interactions with other queens. Lines like “I smell a stunt” and “…back rolls?” came from her confessionals, yes, but especially in season 5, she was largely most quotable in the work room, not in her solo shots. That’s no knock against her, and she still gave us plenty of iconic lines, but a reevaluation that she’s not among the highest echelon of confessional queens.
7. Bianca Del Rio, Season 6
Indisputably, Bianca Del Rio gave us some of the all-time greatest lines in her confessionals. “Calm down, Beyoncé!” “Not today, Satan!” The Drag Race GIF empire was largely built on a foundation of Del Rio bon mots. But what I enjoyed most about Bianca’s confessionals was actually how she slowly let the real her shine through, showing a level head and some real emotional connection to her fellow queens. Quotable and relatable: a winning combination.
6. Kennedy Davenport, Season 7and All Stars 3
The inverse of Alyssa, I originally didn’t plan on ranking Kennedy very high, but the more I reflected on her two seasons’ worth of confessionals, the more I realized she’s an underrated legend. From “Oh no, honey!” to “Girl, please. No, sorry. Next!” to “Fuck my drag, right?”, Kennedy delivered early-season toughness in an environment much less friendly to it. But I really admired just how bold she was in speaking her mind. And she always had such a particular way of saying things that consistently cracked us up.
5. Vanessa Vanjie Mateo, Seasons 10 and 11
And now we reach the golden tier. Honestly, any of the top five could’ve been #1 on sheer quotability alone, which meant I had to decide based on other factors. That’s why Vanjie is down here: While she’s immensely quotable, that’s kind of all she is. She never really brought new insights with her confessionals. That said, as a pure quote factory? Oh my god, Vanjie was unbelievable. Combined with her foghorn of a voice in delivery, and you got a dream.
4. Katya, Season 7 and All Stars 2
Almost everyone else in the top five is a very similar type of queen: loud, high-energy, charismatic, and never stops talking. Katya is not really those things. She’s fairly reserved, at least in comparison to other top confessional queens, and more thoughtful. She’s charismatic for sure, but in kind of an odd, kooky way. But her jokes are so specifically Katya, and so perfectly pitched, that every one lands.
Easily my favorite of hers is her question of when she gets to blow the underwear models for one mini-challenge, following it up with “I can’t say that? I can’t say that either?” Implying something even more deranged before that! Katya’s confessionals break the reality of the confessionals (remember when she didn’t want to do the “It’s a new day in the workroom” bit in All Stars 2?), which couldn’t be more Katya if she tried. Her style is truly her own.
3. Heidi N. Closet, Season 12
More quotable than even Vanjie, and with more of a distinctive point of view to boot, Heidi is an absolute treasure in her confessionals. She has such a particular, perfect way of putting everything (“civil rights hair,” “leprosy print”) and delights in her own jokes. “Overall she delivered. Literally ’cause she was pregnant” was a particular favorite of mine from the Gay’s Anatomy episode. That she manages to be this quotable while still having sharp insights about the show and her competition is a huge credit to the Ramseur queen.
2. Monique Heart, Season 10 and All Stars 4
Giving you the ooh-ah-ah sensation! Brown cow stunning! She’s a production! Monique was on two consecutive seasons of Drag Race, and spent both of them cracking us the hell up. It’s lucky that we’ve had Vanjie and Heidi since, else we might’ve died from the drought of entertainment. Monique used every single one of her confessionals as an opportunity to be a star, and showed us more of her personality and character in them than she did in the challenges. She is, in many ways, the ultimate confessional queen as we traditionally think of the term.
1. Gia Gunn, Season 6 and All Stars 4
But Gia is the true best confessional queen, and I myself am shocked I’m saying that. I didn’t even think about putting Gia on the list when I started this. And then I started to thinking about her sheer number of quotes relative to her short stints on two separate seasons. Like, “This is a place for legends, okay?” is something I quote regularly, and I don’t even realize I’m quoting Gia as I do it. She has a very particular way of delivering her lines that feels more planned and purposeful than the super-charismatic girls, but it also never feels like she’s performing. I believe everything Gia’s saying, and I know she’s taken her time to decide just how to say it.
Her season 6 run is the better of the two for quotes (“Feeling like pussy, feeling like C.U.N.T.”), but honestly you could put any of her confessionals from her two runs in the Confessional Hall of Fame. Even her more emotional ones, like her battle with her identity and her place on Drag Race in All Stars 4, were tremendously compelling. She’s not the archetype of a great confessional queen, but Gia’s dominance in this field is a challenge to the very idea of who a great confessional queen can be.
